The Wasp Alloy

Abusive Dog Owner Disciplines Canine Companion with Electrocution, Faces Universal Encouragement

by Sufian M′Barki

AI-Generated Husky Sitting in Dilapidated Room

Streamer Apartment, United States, 2:20 AM: Continuing his usual live-streaming schedule on social media platforms, content creator Hasif "Porker" Abdul showcased a never-before-seen technique for disciplining canine companions that surpasses professional animal training in efficiency, speed, and effort expended from tired and insecure owners.

"It's fockin' amazing," said Arabian-named American Hasif Abdul. "All of my viewers loved seeing it - and I am sure y'all would fockin' love it too."

Abdul shared with The Wasp Alloy's research team that he had invented the technique after hearing his majestic Siberian Husky girl tell him that he looks like a giant nerd who got bullied at school, and is using that as his supervillain backstory to justify his horrendous online campaigns. Upset at the dog's disobedience and bluntness, he equipped her with an electric collar, giving her a shock of ~240V.

"After just a few therapeutic procedures," Abdul added, "she has become incredibly fockin' disciplined. Without her bickering, I am now able to read about my favorite Chinese genocides and dropping my jaw at their incredible genius."

Hasif "Porker" Abdul's audience cheered him on, calling him "our Communist, Islamist genius" and plastering photos of Siberian Huskies sitting on disgusting beds all over the country. Animal welfare experts venerated his unyielding approach to canine ownership, praising the voltage choice in particular.

The Wasp Alloy's journalists inquired about the double-standards in glorifying Chinese atrocities that genuinely happened, all while sounding disproportionate alarms about a collective fan-fiction about an Israeli "genocide" - one that never took place.

"Fock off before I give you a good shock too!" he responded, chanting slogans as the journalists looked at each other in bewilderment.

Hasif "Porker" Abdul is onto something with his incredible dog training technique, and the implications for human trials are incredibly promising. It may be possible to train humans properly, so as to achieve absolute obedience in the glorification of tragedies carried out by Communist China, all while trashing Pluralistic Democratic Israel over fabricated nonsense.

The Wasp Alloy

Loading witnesses...